Wow. The summer was hard. The Marconi Data Analyzer product
was nearing completion. The company was doing strange
things. They hired a new manager. He elimated the marketing
organization. An outside company was hired to do this. The
manufacturing people (my neighbor across the street) were let go.
Us engineers kept on trucking. The handwriting was on the wall:
the company was bailing out. But us engineers were to busy to
look at the wall.
It all sort of happened at once. They were pleased with my
work. I wqasa ahead of the curve. I mean we really had some
talented people there. Some of the most brilliant I ever worked
with. My cubby partner, you know I forget names, was a
Mennonite. A progressive Mennonite. He drove a
Volkswagon. Yellow, I think. Absolutely brilliant.
Carole and I were to split the time with the kids in half that
summer but we agreed that time spent away from home did not
count. The kids did not want to spend time with their mother so
we arranged to spend maximum time away from home. Both went to
summer camp. I never understood this part. They really
wanted to go but years later Bree complained that she was isolated and
mocked by the other kids. Bree spent the entire 8 weeks there and
was in the rodeo finale. I was so proud of her. Her mother
andwhatever attended. I changed film at the wrong time and they
got the pictures I wished I had gotten.
Bree had chosen the calf-riding event. The first two boys
ahead of her were carried off in stretchers to the ambulance.
Bree could have backed out with no disgrace. No, Bree did
not. She rode that calf. Not very long but she rode
it. I know not very long because my camera was ready but I missed
it. But no ambulance no backing out. Bree rode that little
steer. Bree always did thang that made me proud of her.
Bree an Megan went to visit my sister, Jeanne, that summer. A
summer trip to Hawaii. Well, it was only for two weeks. The
airlines screwed up with the baggage but they actually had it corrected
by the time Jeanne and crew arived at their home ion the North
Shore. I never understood. The kids said they never wanted
to go back to Jeanne;s. They did not like the way she treated her
oldest son. No details and I would not push: same rule as
for her mother: no pushing for details. We had been in Hawaii for
Easter break and visited Jeanne and had a good time so I was
surprised. Maybe it was Christmas break. I should have
written this before when my memory for dates was better. No, my
memory for dates was never good. But always better thanmy memory
for names. People find it hard to believe that I can remember many
things but never a name -- sometimes I forget my own name.
In any case they also visited my mother. They really enjoyed
that. But you see where this is going -- right? Very little
time with me or their mother. I forget where we travelled on
vacation that year. Maybe that was the trip to Hawaii that I just
mentioned. But then Carole's parents wanted equal time. I
had no problem with that but they had constraints that I did not
understand. They wanted the kids to visit them one at a
time. They wanted me to pay for it. I spent hours on the
phone with airline reservations trying to get fares on their visit to
my mother to permit them to stop off in Oklahoma with Carole's
parent. There was no way. And I was not about to pay for
Carole's visit. Two reasons: I did not have the money (my
mother paid for the trips to her) and it angered me that everybody
thought I was a bank just because I had been generous otherwise.
So the kids went to Oklahoma for a couple of weeks. Not one at
a time though. Both at once. Earlier that Spring Bree had
refused to go to her mother's at all. Only Megan had been
going. I knew of the physical abuse there. I had cried at
nght over Megan's bruises. I should have recognized signs of
other abuse (we won't go there on this web page). But Carole had
informed me that when school started I would need to force Bree to go
or she would start the custody lawsuits all over again.
I could not do that to Bree and as it turned out, I did not have
to. Again, back in those days, the airlines had gantries.
Roll-out stairs to the planes. I waited for my kids to get
off. they were the last ones off. And they were both in
tears. I knew there were problems as Carole's parents had
categorically refused to let me speak to the kids during their visit
there. I had complained to Carole and she said that it was not
her problem. But now the kids were distraught and I had made
arrangments to visit a new psychologist in preparation for Carole's
lawsuit. It was coming because I would not force Bree to go to
her mother's if she was determined not to. In fact, I did not see
it as a choice. Even if I had wanted to force Bree, I am not sure
that I could have. Bree was not the kind of person who did things
against her will.
So the kids are crying and it came out that they had spent the
entire two weeks listening to what a bad father IU was and what bad
children they were for wanting to live with me and not their
mother. Those are the best things that were said. The
others need not be stated in this document. But I had only a week
and that week was time for them to be at their mother's.
At least Megan at her mother's since Bree would not go there.
In a week, things were better but not by too much. The girl's had
been told that I would not love them any more if family secrets were
revealed. I assured bith Bree and Megan that nothing would keep
me from loving them, certainly not lies from their grandparents.
But then we went to the psychologist. My worst fears were less
than what I discovered. I paid. Of course I paid. I
paid for my visits. I paid for the kids visits. I paid for
Carole's visits. I paid for her 'husband's visit. See, I do
not always use the 'g' word.
When the visits completed, Bree no longer had to spend time with her
mother -- but Megan did. The magnitude of this problem for Megan
is hard to understand. It was overwhelming. I had always
done my best to treat the kids equally, fair. Now Bree got to
stay home and Megan had to go. The problems for Bree at her
mothe's werre different than those for Megan but what was now fair for
her sister was not fair for her. She was in 6th grade. She
was extremely intelligent. The world was wrong. Her world
was wrong. But both were good kids and they followed the rules.
And they claimed I was poisoning them against their mother? I
know she would never believe it but in many respects I was her best
friend. I had more than enough evidence to keep ... no we won't
go there either.
What we learned from the psychologist shattered my life. I
went to my pastor, Rick Eford, for counseling. He was the
only one I told about the family problems. I was working at
Marconi and doing well but most of the time I was crying. My kids
had been abused. Most of the life I had had with Carole was a
lie. And suddenly there was another bombshell. The church
secretary beleived that I had sexual intent toward her daughter.
Her daughter was the same age and in the same class as Bree.
Believing this was not enough. SHe had told the other mothers in
the church. SHe had told the pastor. She had told her
husband that it was her intent to make me leave the church. He
came over one night and told me this. I had not only loaned him
money when he lost his job. I had bought one of his land
partnerships (fraudulent of course). I was out $9,000 and
now I had to deal with a vidictive woman? I was being accused of
the very thing that my daughters were experiencing. I went to the
woman's house and apologized for any harm that I had done her and her
family and asked wheat it would take to make things better. After
all, I knew their financial situation and I had kept his secret about
money and ... No she got in her car and told me that there was
nothing I could do except leave.
So the very next day Pastor Rick called me intoi his office and told
me about the accusations against me and that I had to apologixze to her
or leave the church. I informed him that this was not a choice on
my part. I informed him that the very nioght before I had
attempted to apologize to her and she refused to accept anything from
me except my expulsion. So I was expulsed. A couple of
church board members came a few weeks later to try to convince me to
change my mind. I always loved the way things get turned
around. I had to aplogize or leave. I had apologized for
anything and everything but that was not enough. I was told to
leave -- and now it was my choice? And this is a "Christian"
church?
Then the bombshell: Marconi was closing. I was no longer an
employee although they would 'contract' me for a coulpe of weeks while
I found a new job. They even shorted my contract but I had enough
money to last the couple of weeks. I was desparate. I would
lose the house. I was never good at finding a job. My
buddy, Lee Enouf, had left Vodavi and was returning to Siemens in Boca
Raton. This is as far from Arizona as you can get and still be in
the United States and nnot need to worry about snow in the
Winter. I hate snow.
But the kids. I had gone to too many schools. My sisters suffered from too many high schools. There was no money. I mean no money at all. The psychologist had gotten the last of my cash. I always lived paycheck to paycheck. There was not even one extra house payment. It would take three months to find a job in Phoenix and I did not have that long. My kids would end up with their mother and I would end up with paying for it all from somewhere that I did not want to be. This was the price to pay for keeping them in the same schools? Oh, my drachmas. Bad joke and inappropriate.
But the interview in Florida went well. I was to help
implement 800 number handling into the new Siemens PBX. I had a
new job. 2500 miles away. I saw a new lawyer. Not really
new. His was the name that seemed to terrorize the physcholist
who was still the official mediator in the child custody. He told
me wthat there was nothing to worry about. Just go and he would
handle the details with Carole. Carole said she would not contest
the move. Surprise? No not really. It was another
lie. I heard fromher lawyer: not a chance. I referred
her to my lawyer. I got a call from Carole. She was
surprised, she thought all of her phone logs would buy her
control. No, we were going to Florida. Bree could visit
within schedule if she wanted. Megan had to go on holidays and
most of the summer. Carole could visit whenever she wanted.
That last was not in the contract but certainly a given.
The company would buy/sell the house. I already had a
contraact onit with my favorite broker.
I received a letter from the principal of Megan's school. It
contained MEgan's ranking in her grade and on standardized tests.
The schools's ranking on those standardized tests. The district's
ranking. The state's ranking. She gave me this as she
stated that sometimes it took months for transcripts to transfer and
this would give the new school details in how to place Megan.
Placing Megan should be easy: 97 per centile or better in
everything. The only problem was that in that school 98% got you
in gifted and Megan missed by less than one point. The word
'gifted' was critical -- and missing.
Now we had to get to Florida.
It was Thanksgiving weekend. Marconi was gone. Claudio
(no last name here!), my boss the Marconi Software Manager, was going
with us. I was driving the mini-van. As it turned out the
ONLY trip that car ever made without needing major repairs. Bree
was staying with a friend. An interesting choice of friends as it
turned out. Claudio was with us when we left Bree off. The
friend's father assured us that Bree was in good hands. I never
understood the entire life of Claudio but he should be writing his own
book. But I do not think Isreal would let him. At one point
Claudio had lived in Argentina. At another point he had been in
the Israeli military. We called him our 'tank commander'.
But he was upset with Bree's friend's father. I thought they had
something in common. Claudio was from Argentina. This man
had worked for the US State Department in Argentina. We
left. Claudio had recognized the man. The US never admitted
having people working in that department of the State Department in
Argentina. I think maybe you only read about that department in
spy stories. In any case we left without Claudio killing him or
the other way around
We took off. We made El Paso the first day. I always
loved driving across New Mexico. Beautiful desert and
mountains. We stayed in a motel and I got up first the next
morning. Claudio was never permitted by the ISreali government to
fly commercial scheduiled airlines. He would call the embassy
with his schedule and he would ride in the cockpit as a guest of the
airlines. This sounds more like a TOm CLancy or RObert Ludlum
thing that I could understand. In this case, we counted on the
name 'Bree' being non-sexual. I had bought a round trip ticket
for Bree from FLorida to Phoenxi and back. Claudio woiuld fly
from Florida and give the return ticket to Bree for when she arrived at
Chrstmas.
But EL Paso. I got up early and locked the keys into the Dodge
Minivan. On of the very few times I ever locked my keys in a
car. But with a Dodge Minivan this is almost a necessary
mishap. You see, the tailgate only opens when the key is in the
ignition and the igniton on. My habit is straight forward:
Pull the keys, put them in my pocket as I leave the car and lock the
door. This is so ingrained in me that if I need the keys, I have
to fish in my pocket for them as I will not remember to not put them in
my pocket. But with the minivan, when you want to get in the
rear, this happen will kill you. The rear hatch is now open but
the keys are locked in the car. When I close the hatch (rather
than crwling through to the front), I am locked out. This is a
"safety" feature of the geniuses at Chrylser Engineering. The
company should have died many years ago. And it is like 6:00 am
on a holiday morning. And I have no raod service. I take
off on foot and finally find a locksmith (I gave up and let my fingers
do the walking). He got to the car at the same time i did and had
the door open in about 15 seconds.
By now Megan and Claudio were ready to go. I guess I
disappointed Claudio. I can drive forever -- if I have
company. I cannot sleep when someone else is driving. So
Claudio did not drive -- he jsut watched the scenery and listened to my
undending jabber. Claudio was having wife problems that we did
not discuss. He was also going to the University of Phoenix to
get his college degree. I do not know if it was his bachelors or
his master but he was smart enough that it could have been
either.
Somewhere along in Mississippi two things happened. The first
was that I dscovered that Megan could not read street signs. We
would get her glasses at the first opportunity. She was in 6th
grade and we did not know that she could not see very far. Shame
on me for not checking sooner. I had vision problems in grade
school and nobody checked me until I did when I was 20. The
second thing was something that we both always remember. We had
come from Arizona. Some of the district public schools were
the best anywhere. Now we were driving through an area joked
about for their bad schools. Megan had always had an attitude
prolem with other students. It took most of kidergarden to get he
to stop calling them "dummies". I told Megan that she was about
to enter a world with a lower class of dumb than she had ever
seen. This was way lower than anything I had even expected.
The Southern schools are a bad joke. A really bad joke. We should
not be making fun of them.
Years later I saw a giant factory in Mississippi. A car
plant. Mercedes I think. I also saw later ads for people to
work there. $50,000 plus expenses. The plant was closed
when I saw it. I also read about it later in the news. They
had a problem. There were not enough people in Mississippi who
had enough education to be trainable to meet the needs of the
plant. Advertising outside of Mississsippi did not draw enough
peoplw. Would you go there knowing about the schools there?
Times have changed. My viewpoint is a viewpoint but the brand new
plant was closed.
We stayed at a couple of motels. I remeber one in north
Florida. THe one with teh sun on its sign. Days Inn, I
think it is. The bed sheets had cookie crumbs in them. They
had obviously not been changed since the last people had slept
there. I did not tell Megan or Claudio because I was so dead on
my feet that I was asleep in minutes, crumbs or no crumbs. But I
always remember the Sunny sign and the crumbs. The manager
apologized the next morning when we checked out. He said if I had
complained they would have changed the sheets. He probaly would
have but he should have never allowed the sheets to be still there in
the first place.
We arrived in Boca, found the apartment that Siemens had set up for
us and Claudio took off for a tour of the keys. I was worried
about Bree's ticket but I should not ahve been. Claudio was an
honest person and good to his word andhad silently watched me endanger
our trip by driving when he should have been driving.
The apartment was interesting. We were not supposed to have
pets. We let the cats out on the screened porch only.
Murphy liked to climb the screens. Whatever. We did not
stay there long. I was in for a shock.
Phoenix has open school districts. That is, your kid can go to
any school in the disrict. If it is not the nearest school, then
you have to provide transportation. But the student do get bus
passes on thepublic buses. But Florida, has closed
districts. You must go to the schoold esignated for your
house. Now we had a problem. We had to find an apartment
which was in the district with the best schools. Moreover, we
would have to find a house to buy in the same schoiol districts.
I say districts because, the middle and high schools have separate
boundaries. It was like threading 4 needles simultaneously.
The Loggers' Run Middle school was obviously the best for
Megan. This put us in the Spanish River High School
district. That is unless we chose a neighborhood that should go
to these schools but was bused to the other schools for racial
integration.
And things got worse. Florida does not place students into
gifted becauseof their test scores or abilities. No. They
get placed by IQ. IQ is a mechanism whereby someone assigns
you a score based upon how much you pay them or the number of Internet
triiva questions you can guess correctly. So now to get Bree and
Meganproperly placed, I had to find a placement psycholoist and have
them tested. After having Megan tested, I got another
surprise. The tester was only interested in which private school
she could place Megan. I was wasting her time and my money in
testing for a public school. Interwsting as it was a public
school who had recommented this individual. But I had a lot to
learn about FLorida.
I was glad I was not likely to run into my old neighbor with the
dogs but I considered that the least of my worries. The schoolw
ould not place MEgan in their gifted classes because I did not have IQ
scores from the psycholgist and she did not come from a gifted
class. The letter from the Ligberty principal was ignored as it
was obviously all lies since no school and no district and no state
could have the test scores that were on this letter. ANything
better than Loggers' Run scores were obviously lies since no place was
better than Loggers' Run.
But they did compormise. Megan would be reevaluated by her
teachers at CHristma and at the smester for possible advancement.
Ah -- Loggers' Run still 'tracked' students by their teachers opinions
and grades. The teachers at these evaluations all agreed with
Megan and MEganand against the couselor (who had called me
aliar). Megan was moved forward both times.
Bree came for a week at Christmas. I went back for a few days
about the same time to see the movers move out of the Blanche
house. We had an apartment at that time. And settled in.
THe trip back was interesting. I stopped in the Marconi offices which were down to about 4 people. The sole remaining software engineer wanted to show me the results of my couple of weeks work. He was more than impressed. The data analyzer was originally designed with two graphical analysis display formats. My contract was to provide a third format. The product was given a three-year development time and we were at the end of five years. Thwas why the product was sold: the market window was long gone. But it had taken them the 5 to get ehat they had. Now there was a whole lotmore in there than two display formats. I got in at the end and supported some OS features and the actual data analisys program. But I had written this entire feature i thwo weeks. And it worked when the last engineer tried it out. I had not tried it out I was too busy. The story of my life: the genius of my programming skills is discovered after I leave. Not a problem any more.
So now we have Megan in school. We arrange for Bree to enter
SPanish River. The smester ends and Bree arrives. You now
also understnad the magnitude of Bree's dislike of living with her
mother: she lived with a friend rather than live with her mother.
Spanish River.: The Brave New World.